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        God, through Christ and His Spirit, will reveal to me what His will is for a rel
I am currently saved, and I am currently friends with a young lady who is saved. Our friendship has grown as we have learned a lot from each other about the Bible, Christ, and ourselves.

Recently, she revealed some things to me about her past - prior to surrendering to Christ. She informed me of prior abortions as a teenager, sexual relationships in the past, and her contraction of an STD (not HIV). As a friend, I hurt b/c of her unwise decisions. As one who is attracted to her, I'm angered that she made the decisions, and I'm angered at myself b/c I'm showing signs of a judgemental heart. I am not perfect, and I know she is not. Nevertheless, I am wondering if God is a.) testing me to reveal unto me that I have some residual unforgiveness/judgement in my heart, b.)revealing my wife to me, c.)telling me to just remain her friend and that's it...

I'm confused, and sadly, I am afraid. I'm afraid that if God is telling me that she is my wife, I will not be able to handle her past mistakes, thus making me feel less than a Christain. I know that a person is a "new" creature when he/she has accepted Christ, but for some reason, there is a thorn in my heart that is making me look at her in an un-Christain manner. I want to be there for her and love through her hurt and disappointment. Instead, I feel like I am looking upon her with judging eyes.

I am ashamed and saddened. God could be working a beautiful testimony in both of us, and I'm afraid that my thorn (though small now) of judgement/unforgiveness will prevent that. PLEASE PRAY FOR ME, AND HER, ON ALL THE TOPICS MENTIONED ABOVE. My heart longs to be with her, but I know that if I cannot address some of the issues in my heart, I might have to abandon a wonderful relationship.

-Saddened Christain. 
Monday, February 25, 2002 11:58:21 AM   steelers
      re:God, through Christ and His Spirit, will reveal to me what Hi   
Praise the Lord that your heart has been convicted. It will be through your conviction that your heart and mind will grow towards God. Her sharing her past is just that, her past. If you believe that this is your"wife" then accept the gift of forgiveness and grace that has been bestowed on you and thank God. If you believe this is a test of your faith in Christ, you have missed he restoration that Jesus Christ brings in our new life. For he has restored your friend to the point that she can openly discuss her hurts, pains and disappointments. The wounds have healed, but a scar was left as a reminder of that sin. Praise the Lord.
Let us pray, Father in Heaven, we come to ask that this your child's heart will be touched by the love of Christ towards himself and that he will allow your love to heal his heart and mind for your Glory. Let him know that your word of forgiveness is true, you declare that if we confess our sins you are faithful to forgive us of those sins. And that they are cast into the sea of forgetfulness never to bother us again. Teach your child's heart to forgive and measure only aganist Christ Jesus. For it is Christ Jesus that lived a sin free life. Now Lord, reveal into this relationship your divine order for it and prepare the hearts and mind for the answer. We ask in Christ Jesus name, Amen 
Thursday, March 21, 2002 6:52:41 PM reh
      re:God, through Christ and His Spirit, will reveal to me what Hi   
Sexual sin is no different from any other, but it seems to affect us more strongly, when we hear about it in a loved one's past. Anything else that our loved one had done, probably wouldn't bring out feelings of judgement; we'd be able to accept it. Her past sin was allowed to happen by God, to ultimately bring her to Him. She had no comprehension of God and His ways at the time; she was a different person, not the person that you're with now. I know you already know all of this. It may be particularly hard for you to take at the moment, simply because it's a relatively recent "revelation" to you; she's suddenly "changed" in your eyes to a certain extent. You have to get used to this new information, to absorb it, then let it go, along with everything else that was part of her life before Jesus and before you. Right now, it's probably still having a bit of a shock effect. I had a relationship with someone that had had a very promiscuous past and it was hard for me, thinking about some of the things that he'd done, but in time, my love for Him (and God's love in me for him), pushed those thoughts further away as we began a new life together. It was the new person that I was with - the old became just like a character from a story - someone I'd never met, someone that didn't exist. You can only continue to pray about it. I think you're right about God testing you, in all the ways you mentioned. He'll show you the answer. If He wants you to be with her, He'll make it clear. I'll pray for you. God bless. Joanne
P.S You were worried that you might not be able to handle her past mistakes and that that would make you feel less of a Christian. It's not up to you to handle them; Jesus is the one that wants to handle everything in your life for you; give it over to Him; He's able, you're not. None of us can handle mistakes - our own, or those of others, but we've not been called to. It's Jesus' job. Let HIM do it. 
Wednesday, February 27, 2002 2:30:44 AM guest

changed on Wednesday, February 27, 2002 2:43:34 AM

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